I ONLY POST ABOUT PNEMONIA!!!

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277k ratings

See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
imsrryboris
failgirlgut

Draw trans bodies pls im so tired of lesbian art being just thin dainty women with a little bit of bush over their vag draw trans women draw women with square bodies broad shoulders draw women with adams apples draw women with strong jaws draw women with cocks draw women with tummies draw women with no tits draw women with saggy tits draw women with stretchmarks draw women of every shape and size

failgirlgut

Draw women of color.

failgirlgut

Hi reblog this version actually i fuckin see you

wizard-council-bureaucrat
relientk
clitfisto

peeling those sour rainbow gummy strips into long thin strings and putting them into cheap energy drink to create something im calling battery acid spaghetti will update once ive finished it

clitfisto

dont do this

babblingbranches

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cryptoidantagonist

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I really hope its not too bad bc i actually love both components.

cryptoidantagonist

it forms a dry skin at the top made of the sour pellets. not a great start.

cryptoidantagonist

tastes really good actually. i also feel like i am about to explode.

cryptoidantagonist

do not do this.

jenjensd

Unanimous consensus: Do not do this

Other people: Hold on I’m about to do this

jenjensd

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vidicus3
turnipwine

it’s weird if fat people don’t exist in your art

turnipwine

i want to say that this isn’t an attempt to guilt you into learning. i don’t want you to disingenuously draw fat bodies because i made you feel bullied, or because you want some sort of online clout. i’m tired of begging other artists to do something they obviously don’t want to do, so i’m not begging. i’m stating what i think of you and your work. no matter your skill, no matter your presence: it’s weird if fat people don’t exist in your art

vidicus3

This post:

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teaboot
metalheadsforblacklivesmatter

"Walkable city" is not "City where to have to walk everywhere."

"Walkable city" is.

  1. Sidewalks big enough to fit you, your stroller, your wheelchair, your guide dog, or anything else you need when you're getting from one place to another.
  2. Safe crosswalks frequent enough so you don't need to walk in traffic.
  3. Bike lanes to keep bikes out of foot traffic and car traffic.
  4. Accessible and affordable public transit.
  5. Cities where the essentials are close enough you can travel on foot (or in wheelchair)
  6. Cities where it's reasonable to be able to get from point a to point b without requiring you, yourself, to drive

People get so caught up in the "Walkable" part of the term and like to spout "Walkable cities are abelist because not everyone can walk".

Bitch. The modern city structure is abelist because not everyone can drive. And classist because not everyone can afford a car and it's pretty damn impossible to get a job if you don't have a car.

Walkable cities are cities where people can reasonably get from pointA to pointB without requiring a motor vehicle.

"But fae. Disabled people have issues using the paths in modern cities." Bitch abled people can barely use the paths in modern cities. That's kind of the fucking problem.

Also walkable cities have fucking benches. Not only for disabled people. But sometimes you just twist your ankle and need to sit for a moment.

"Put fae. If you have benches, homeless people will sleep on them."

Then get fucking housing for the homeless. Problem solved. They'll sleep in their nice warm homes instead of on the benches.

-fae

tenefrog
writing-prompt-s

You and your other co-workers have known for a while that something is impersonating your boss. But no one has bothered to say anything because under its leadership the workplace has become an enjoyable place. Today you’re training a new employee when they see the boss eating a delivery driver.

tenefrog

I got inspired by this one, so please enjoy!

Ever since Dexter was ‘replaced’, work was far more pleasant.


For around a month, your boss has been….different, to say the least.

The first few days it was quite obvious something had taken his place.

He often stumbled, like he wasn’t used to having legs. He ate oddly, in fact you could have sworn he consumed a donut whole, and often came into work with brown lunch bags, like the ones frozen rats would come in. His tongue even seemed semi-forked, and his canines were sharper.


Normally you and your coworkers would try and discover what happened, or fear for your lives, but none of you bothered, as this new ‘Dexter’ was far more enjoyable to be around. He raised all of your wages, genuinely listened to your issues, and was overall far more pleasant.


In addition, instead of hitting on Jane, his secretary, he seemed more interested in you. You believed this was spurred on when you asked for a sick day to take your pet snake to the vet, as he was seeming a tad ill. Unlike your former employer, he was interested once you brought your request forth.


“Ah, ssso your little one isss feeling under the weather, yesss?”


You were unfazed by the suspicious lisp, and nodded.


“ I know it’s a bit short of a notice, but-“


“Permissssion granted, but I would like to…resssquest sssomething”


You raised your eyebrows,


“What kind of something?”


“Picturesss of the noodle, I enjoy sssnakesss. I have sssseveral at home, actually!”


You knew your old boss barely tolerated dogs, much less any other animal, so this was another point on the ‘boss got replaced by an outer entity’ scale, but you didn’t mind. You agreed, and ever since then ‘Dexter’ has had a noticeable affection for you.


The real Dexter was frankly gross in his pursuit of romance, and drenched in misogyny. ‘Dexter’, however, was far more sweet and slightly dumb in this field. You often had gummy rats placed at your desk, while ‘Dexter’ looked like he was trying very hard to not seem like the one who did it. It was frankly adorable.


Things proceeded like this for awhile, with the weirdness of your new boss slowly becoming normal.


Until today.


You were waiting on a delivery of a new fax machine; the old one had been thrown out the window by not ‘Dexter’, but Jane surprisingly.


Soon, the dreaded delivery man had arrived.


Why dreaded? Because he was complete asshole, who also wanted in your pants.


His name is Todd, and he was the definition of a ‘nice guy’, wrapped up in the body of a frat boy.


He exited the vehicle, and plopped the new machine on the ground, all the while looking you up like a piece meat.


“Hey Angie, how are you doing baby?”


You rolled your eyes,


“Fine, Todd”


He chuckled and stood up,


“I was wondering, do you want to hang out sometime; we could go to that hobby shop you like~”


You groaned,


“No Todd, I’ve got enough plans this weekend”


He tried to give you a sweet look, but failed to hide his grimace,


“Aw man, come on! You know you’re just gonna get dead mice for your slimy snakes! They can wait, lest you miss the chance to find true love!”


Again you groaned,


“Dude, I’ve got work to do today, I don’t have time for this! Plus, you’re not gonna get a girl by insulting their choice in pets…”


“Wait, aren’t snakes slimy? How is that rude?”


You sighed and went to return to the office, you couldn’t carry the fax machine in yourself so you wanted to get an extra hand.


Suddenly, you felt your arm being grabbed.


“Hey, why are you leaving so soon, you’re missing a real opportunity here!”


Todd was griping your arm rather hard, and you felt a wave of anxiety flow through you.


“Todd, let go of me”, you said sternly.


He ignored you, and pulled you closer.


“You girls can’t recognize perfection even if it were to hit you on the head! Come on, give me a chance!”


You tried to pull away, but he kept you in place. Fear pumped through your blood, and you about to scream until you heard footsteps.


The sound caused Todd to let go, and he looked around wildly while you stumbled to stand up properly.


The source of the sounds were two people, ‘Dexter’ and a new girl, who was holding a box of donuts.


Todd quickly made himself look like he wasn’t about to commit a crime, and waved.


“Hey, I got your new fax machine here!”


You meanwhile quickly walked towards the other people, you would have to tell what had happened to you later but staying with the others would keep you safe.


‘Dexter’ waved back at both of you, but took a moment to stare at you. You were trying to not seem shaken up, so Todd wouldn’t act defensive and possibly cause more of a ruckus.


“Ah, I sssee. I’ve alssso brought sssomething, or rather sssomeone. Thisss isss Ssssam, and sssshe’ss a new employee!”


The girl in question waved,


“Pleasure to met you!”


Before you could say anything, ‘Dexter’ interrupted.


“Sssay, I’m sssorry to place thisss on you, Angela, but could you take Ssssam here to the photocopier? I have a folder here needing to be copied, and I feel it would be a great opportunity to ssshow her around ssome. Could you give me the copied filessss afterward, by the way?”


You nodded, it’d be a good excuse to hide from Todd awhile, until he leaves.


The man in question started to get back into the car, until ‘Dexter’ addressed him.


“Todd, you ssshouldn’t leave before being paid, ssstay for a tad while I dig in my wallet”


You could have sworn he glared at the delivery driver, but you though it was just the lighting.


You and Sam then entered the office, and began to copy what was contained in the folder.


“So, how long have you been here, A-angela?”, Sam said, trying to make some small talk.


You decided to play along, both to be polite and soothe your nerves.


“Eh, about a year. It’s been an interesting ride, but this month has been very nice for the most part”


“That’s good to hear! I was a bit nervous talking with Mr Dexter, especially with that…intimidating look of his, but he seems quite nice actually”


You nodded, sliding the next paper into the copier. You then realized you should probably let her know about the…weirdness, though.


“Ah, Dexter is chill, although it’s a running joke in the office he’s like an alien or something”


“Huh, why’s that?”


You were about to answer, but you noticed something on the next file. Before he was replaced, Dexter’s last name was Jackson. Now, it was listed as ‘Yig’, a very odd last name to be sure.


“For example, his last name was Jackson, but here it’s now Yig”


“I mean it’s odd, but maybe he just thought it was a better last name?”


You shook your head,


“Ever since the beginning of the month, he’s been like a completely different person. Hence the joke that something replaced the original Dexter, although it’s not exactly just a joke”


Sam looked a tad uncomfortable, and you decided to cut the talk short. Plus, all the files were now copied, and needing to be given to ‘Dexter’.


“Is he still out there?”, you asked Sam.


Before she could answer though, a scream rang through the air.


A very Todd-like scream.


Both you and Sam looked at each other, before grabbing the new files and running outside.


At first, nothing seemed off, with Todd’s truck still parked in the park lot.


But, you both heard a scuffle in a nearby alleyway, and decided to walk over to it.


You two walked quietly, as you both didn’t want to draw attention towards yourselves.


It was hard to stay silent though, when greeted with the sight in front of you. At least you and your colleagues suspicions were right though.


Todd was trashing against a serpentine ‘Dexter’, who was currently attempting to both constrict and devour the delivery man.


Despite the sight in front of you both, you were not terribly frightened of what was occurring.


Sam, however, pulled you away from the entrance of the alleyway, and whispered fearfully.


“Holy shit you weren’t kidding, what the fuck. How are you so calm about this!?”


You shrugged,


“I mean, I told you. But I’ve never seen him be this bizarre-“


“We need to save that man!”, she responded.


“Well about that…that dude tried to….assault me earlier sooo-“


Sam’s eyes widened,


“He what.”


“Yeah, didn’t say anything earlier since I didn’t want to mention anything with him around, since didn’t want to risk him getting aggressive and hurting someone. But it seems Dexter figured out what happened”


Another scream sounded, almost on cue.


“Miss, while I do agree he should be punished, I don’t think it’d be a good idea for our boss to be tried for murder-“


As much as you wanted Todd to reap the karma he sowed, you agreed that having the best boss you’ve ever had possibly be banished back to whatever realm he came from would suck.


“Yeah, you’ve got a point. Dexter is too good for this shit, maybe we can fill him up with donuts or something later as a consolation prize…”


You gently offered your hand to the nervous newbie, who did not deserve to see this crap on her first day, and walked back to the about to be crime scene.


When you both returned, it seems the Todd was doing a terrible job of escaping, as ‘Dexter’ had walked his jaws up to around the ‘nice guy’’s hips.


“Hey, boss, we got your papers here!”


The old god whipped his head towards you two, with Todd hanging from his jaws like a dog toy.


Soon after, the manchild was unceremoniously spat into the wall, still panicking.


You two continued to watch the loony toon-ish series of events play out, with Todd knocking himself out by running directly headfirst into a pipe, and a now more human ‘Dexter’ trying to reset his bottom jaw.


Your boss walked towards you two soon after, seemingly embarrassed about what had occurred.


“Here, got your files done ‘Yiggy’”, you said with a slight smile.


He gently took them from you, trying to not look you in the face.


“Tell no one of thissss pleassse”


While Sam anxiously watched, you continued to chat with him.


“Lips are sealed, but honestly I respect the whole… punishing people like him. Just get them arrested or fired though, lest the police go after you or something.

Now, do you want to just…talk in the office with me and Sam to explain some things? You can have the whole-ass box of donuts if you want”


The embarrassed employer nodded, and you knew that at least Todd won’t be bothering you anymore.

four-green-waterbottles
longreads

A severe car crash left Anne Lagamayo with a traumatic brain injury. It was the height of the pandemic, and she was thousands of miles away from home. In her new Longreads essay, she reflects on how her world has changed—and her slow path to recovery—in 10 steps.

“You’re doomed forever to live in your parents’ home, sucking their money and time like a parasite when they’re this close to retirement, all of you sitting in your wheelchairs together in front of the TV in the evenings.”

Read Anne’s essay, “How to Survive a Car Crash in 10 Easy Steps,” on Longreads.

four-green-waterbottles

oh shit im crashing hold on lemme *checks phone* gimme a sec